The One I Love Most

It’s just crossed my mind – about loving someone, and what is the best means to measure it.

It’s natural to expect someone you like (or you love) to feel the same way with you. And when you don’t get the expected response, it’s just human to feel sad and disappointed. But sometimes, it leads me to think further whenever I feel this way – do you truly love or care about this person? Or the only thing you want to have is to be loved?

Well, of course it’s always pleasant to be loved by someone. There’s someone out there cares for you, prays for you, always be there for you. Who doesn’t want to have that? But when the one you expect to love you – isn’t the one you really love, I think at that point, love becomes less valuable.

So whenever I grow anxious about, well, you know, relationship and all that… I always ask myself: do you really love him? Or is it yourself you really care about? Do you really care about him? Or you’re just trying to get some happiness out of him?

Well, sometimes the most honest answer is not very pleasing. And it sometimes is not the one I really want to hear. But it gives me clearer perspective of my own feeling, and my own desire.

May God purify my heart, to be honest when I give in my heart to others. To love in purity and in the fear of God – neither for my gain nor for my sake, but to glorify God by reflecting His love towards another.

How do you know when you love someone?

The one that is dear, near in your heart, at the most time of your prayer to God.

That’s the one.

The one I love most.

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